An Inauguration Poem

My inauguration invitation has yet to arrive.

It surely will announce I’m the new poet laureate guy.

Big league thinkers are busily focusing on larger stagecraft.

With the words they could spare I sketched out this rough draft:

For Trump’s inauguration it may prove wise.

To consider a comparison to 13 of the other guys.

Washington could not tell a lie.

Trump says, “I knew George Washington–he was a great guy.”

Thomas Jefferson got the country a great deal on the Louisiana purchase.

Trump can get you a steal on Invanka’s new line of Beijing-made purses.

Millard Fillmore gave the White House indoor plumbing.

Trump says the First Amendment is what needs flushing.

Teddy Roosevelt liked to walk softly, but carry a big stick.

Trump prefers to tweet loudly from a tiny little fingertip.

Warren G. Harding is remembered for the scandal of Tea Pot Dome.

Trump’s overseas ventures leave open the back door to his throne.

FDR brought the Nazi fascists to defeat.

Trump made Steve Bannon his strategy chief.

John Kennedy and Jackie made the White House seem like Camelot.

Trump appointed JFK’s nephew to give us all chickenpox.

LBJ lifting his dog up by the ears seemed a tad cruel.

Trump meanwhile brags he grabs women by the poodle.

Nixon requested a Democratic headquarters break in.

Trump outsourced it to a Russian plumber named Putin.

Ford was portrayed as tripping over his own feet.

Trump’s big war well may start over a 3 a.m. tweet.

Carter was criticized for a time of national malaise.

Trump has really huge plans for our Republic’s final days.

Reagan helped dissolve the Soviet Union.

Trump prefers to enjoy their hotel rooms.

Obama served without scandal for eight years of hope.

Trump hopes to make “Scandal” his new reality tv show.

Trump used to be known for his so-called university.

Now he’s caused a surge in those seeking Russian degrees.

Trump claimed Obama’s a Kenyan Muslim, one of many lies.

But dare to criticize Trump and his fans demand know why.

If Trump’s words and deeds seem to you abnormal, you are one of plenty.

Who will not shut up, give up, nor look away, from today all the way to 2020.


2017 by David Schleicher (

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